Just One (Sus)Man’s Opinion: I Can’t Go Wrong Thinking ‘Justice League’ Will Suck

I, Ric Susman, am channeling my inner “Parker Lewis” right now. Because when it comes to the Justice League movie, I, like Parker, can’t lose.

When the movie was announced I was instantly concerned. Man of Steel wasn’t great, BvS: DoJ was terrible (It was Green Lantern bad.), so I was pretty sure JL would also be, as the French say, “Le Butt Trash.”

Since we are just 3 weeks (Really!) away from the biggest movie for the entire DCEU and what could be the most important movie in DC Comics history period, I have come to a conclusion. No matter what happens, I am going to come out smelling like a rose.

This is the very simple math that will confirm the impossibility of my “losing.” Either (a) this movie is terrible and I was right to call it such from jump, or (b) this movie is great and I have to eat crow for a wonderful reason. I would be over the moon with (b). It means that my favorite characters and my favorite universe are finally moving in the right direction on the big screen. So, if I have to admit I was wrong, I am TOTALLY DOWN with that.

However, if it’s (a) and this movie is the most dumpstery fire in the history of dumpsters being on fire, then I was right all along. If you listen to our show, you know that I value being right a hell of a lot more than being happy. So I would be very proud to have predicted this outcome, while also being devastated that the film I’ve been waiting my whole life for sucked all the ass.

So, there you have it. I either win, or a take an L but still win because Justice League wasn’t terrible. No matter how you slice it, I can’t really lose. Parker Lewis may be gone but his spirit lives on in my general disdain and modicum of hope.

-The Sus-Man

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Mini-Sode 4: The 2017 San Diego Comic-Con Special

It’s our annual Comic-Con Special! We’re breaking down some of the biggest stories of this year’s Comic-Con International: San Diego, from the first footage of Spielberg’s Ready Player One to the new Spawn movie (for real, they swear), plus all the big announcements from Marvel and DC about their upcoming films. As a bonus, find out which of the Jerks doesn’t know much about microphones! T2J and SDCC: they go together like PB and J!

Those Two Jerks: Mini-Sode 4

Episode 108: Don’t Let It Go to the Scorecards

The Jerks break down the major moves in the NBA, the end of the #NewYorkSuperteam, the backlash from last week’s Tebow blast, and Manny Pacquiao’s shocking loss. Plus, the polarized response to the Jumanji trailer, comic and TV reviews, and Ric’s “scientific” study of Pepsi Fire! T2J – now in crystal clear Sound-O-Vision!

Those Two Jerks: Episode 108

Volume 9, Episode 1: Tim Tebow, Chris Sale, and The Vulture-Prowler Connection

The Jerks have a nice laugh at the expense of Taylor Heinicke, Tim Tebow and Chris Sale. Plus, they break down UFC 201, recap San Diego Comic-Con, and review Batman: The Killing Joke. It’s the podcast for people who thought Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow had some redeeming qualities!

Those Two Jerks: Volume 9, Episode 1

Mini-Sode 1: The 2016 Comic-Con Special

Our first ever Mini-Episode focuses entirely on all the HUGE news from this year’s Comic-Con International: San Diego! Hear the Jerks’ takes on the trailers for Dr. Strange and the X-Men spinoff series Legion, plus the big news about Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, Black Panther, Thor: Ragnarok (Gladiator Hulk!) and Brie Larson being cast as Captain Marvel. They’re also taking a look at the trailers for Suicide Squad, Wonder Woman and Justice League, plus breaking down the news about the new Star Trek TV series, Discovery! It’s Comic-Con-a-licious!

Those Two Jerks: Mini-Sode 1

Volume 8, Episode 5: The NFL Draft, Civil War and Han Solo

We’re inching ever-closer to our 100th episode! The Jerks recap the lackluster NFL Draft, explain why Dana Stubblefield is ALLEGEDLY the worst person on Earth, and break down Father Time’s continued winning streak (this time, he defeats the New York Yankees). Plus, they discuss the Flash movie’s need of a new director, those new Power Rangers costumes, and why there probably shouldn’t be a Han Solo movie. Those Two Jerks: Like bubble wrap for your ears!

Those Two Jerks: Volume 8, Episode 5

Volume 8, Episode 2: Jerks v. Batman v. Superman

After YEARS of coverage and discussion, the Jerks FINALLY saw Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice. What did they think? Find out in our extended, very special episode!

Those Two Jerks: Volume 8, Episode 2