Episode 120: Kaepernick Collusion, the Browns’ Trade Debacle, Black Adam and The Last Jedi

The Jerks take a look at the ongoing collusion case Colin Kaepernick is pursuing against the NFL owners, plus the Cleveland Browns being the Browns and botching a trade because of paperwork, and why Justin Verlander is having the best quarter ever. Plus, the Black Adam movie gets a writer, Star Wars continues to push the “Dark Side Luke” concept for The Last Jedi, and why littering really pisses Tom off. T2J – It’s like Charlie Rose, with swearing!

Those Two Jerks: Episode 120

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Episode 119: Texans Protest, Yuli Gurriel, Shazam! and Contra

The Jerks discuss a busy week in both the worlds of sports and pop culture, from the Houston Texans players squaring off with their team’s owner, to Yuli Gurriel’s racial slur at the World Series and the 49ers asking fans if they care whether the team wins. Plus, why Tom thinks Zachary Levi will be great as DC’s Shazam!, whether the Deathstroke movie will actually get made and our thoughts on a TON of proposed Hollywood franchises and reboots, from Contra to Ace Ventura and Major League. T2J — it’s so full of comedy, you’ll get indigestion!

Those Two Jerks: Episode 119

Just One (Sus)Man’s Opinion: I Can’t Go Wrong Thinking ‘Justice League’ Will Suck

I, Ric Susman, am channeling my inner “Parker Lewis” right now. Because when it comes to the Justice League movie, I, like Parker, can’t lose.

When the movie was announced I was instantly concerned. Man of Steel wasn’t great, BvS: DoJ was terrible (It was Green Lantern bad.), so I was pretty sure JL would also be, as the French say, “Le Butt Trash.”

Since we are just 3 weeks (Really!) away from the biggest movie for the entire DCEU and what could be the most important movie in DC Comics history period, I have come to a conclusion. No matter what happens, I am going to come out smelling like a rose.

This is the very simple math that will confirm the impossibility of my “losing.” Either (a) this movie is terrible and I was right to call it such from jump, or (b) this movie is great and I have to eat crow for a wonderful reason. I would be over the moon with (b). It means that my favorite characters and my favorite universe are finally moving in the right direction on the big screen. So, if I have to admit I was wrong, I am TOTALLY DOWN with that.

However, if it’s (a) and this movie is the most dumpstery fire in the history of dumpsters being on fire, then I was right all along. If you listen to our show, you know that I value being right a hell of a lot more than being happy. So I would be very proud to have predicted this outcome, while also being devastated that the film I’ve been waiting my whole life for sucked all the ass.

So, there you have it. I either win, or a take an L but still win because Justice League wasn’t terrible. No matter how you slice it, I can’t really lose. Parker Lewis may be gone but his spirit lives on in my general disdain and modicum of hope.

-The Sus-Man

Mini-Sode 7: No NFL Kneeling Rule, Justice League vs. Punisher, and Evil Vin Scully

It’s a mini-sode, but it’s chock full of funny stuff. The Jerks discuss the NFL owners choosing not to force the players to stand for the national anthem, and preview the 2017 World Series with legendary Dodgers broadcaster Vince Gully (That’s how you spell his name, right?)! Plus, Marvel and Netflix throw down their Punisher gauntlet in the face of DC and Justice League, and a conversation about the Black Panther trailer gets intense. T2J: Now with three times the dirty old man stories!

Those Two Jerks: Mini-Sode 7

Episode 118: Jags’ Owner on Trump, College Football Upsets, and A Whole Lotta Trailers

Jacksonville Jaguars owner Shad Khan can’t seem to make up his mind about President Trump, and the Jerks are talking about it. Plus, some major upsets in college football, and some smack talk from the #LeagueOfJerks. We’re also taking a close look at all the big movie and TV trailers from the past week, including Justice LeagueStar Wars: The Last JediThe New Mutants, and the new season of Stranger Things. Those Two Jerks: We’re only doing this to try and get McDonald’s to bring back the Arch Deluxe!

Those Two Jerks: Episode 118

Just One (Sus) Man’s Opinion: Why the Yankees Have Ruined Baseball

So, the New York Yankees knocked out the Indians and have moved on to the ALCS. In doing so the Yankees have effectively killed baseball.

How could that be, you may ask? I’ll tell you. Baseball is in a very weird time right now, where it is looking less and less likely that the mantra of “Just Stay Open” is going to work. Baseball needs something, and last year we got the end of the worst drought in the history of the sport: the Chicago Cubs won the World Series

The Cubs left one team with a legendary losing streak to vanquish. That team is the Cleveland Indians, a team that was so good during the regular season they set a record, winning 22 games in a row!

Did this matter to the “Evil Empire”? Would they recognize that another Yankees pennant could mean the end of anyone outside of New York caring about baseball ever again? Of course not. The Yankees did what the Yankees do: they found a way to ruin everyone’s fun and ruined baseball.

Now, we all have to hope that the Houston Astros recognize that they need to lay down to the Yankees so the Cubs (Assuming they can get the job done tonight) can vanquish the Empire once and for all.

In fact, the bigger story than the Indians ending their drought would have been the Cubs winning two in a row. Nothing would cement the “return” of baseball than the Cubs slaying the dragon of the Yankees. I mean now that the Indians couldn’t get the job done.

But what happens if the Cubs lose to the Los Angeles Dodgers and the Astros take down the Yankees? Maybe we have a great story for the people of Houston, who could certainly use a great end to a terrible year, and the Texans aren’t going to provide it.

That won’t happen, of course. No, somehow, someway, we will have the LA/NY series that everyone will roll their eyes at because of how obvious it will be. Because the Yankees are a blight on the world and the Dodgers are just a less-successful version of the Yankees.

Meanwhile, it’s almost time for us to start thinking about next year, and the Mets are already mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. #stillmad

-The Sus-Man

Episode 117: NBA Expansion, MLB Playoffs, and the (Lack Of) Justice League Buzz

NBA Commissioner Adam Silver is hinting about expansion (and shortening the season?!), and the Jerks are talking about it! Plus, the MLB Playoffs begin, a breakdown of the (lack of) buzz around Justice League, and we try and figure out when a game about fighting Nazis became offensive. T2J – Just when we thought we were done talking about current events, they pulled us back in!

Those Two Jerks: Episode 117